Friday, April 30, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Do you want to run away from all your problems?
I certainly have problems that I’d like to avoid. Problems are hurtful, distracting and agitating. Why wouldn’t I want to get as far away from them as possible?
That feeling you get when a big crisis pops up is sickening. It can feel like you went bungee jumping without a rope.
That’s why I recently set out to find the most used strategies for running away from problems. I wanted to uncover some things I could try. Fortunately, it wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be to find popular tactics. It seems that I’m not alone in wanting to avoid problems.
From my research, I found there are literally millions of people already using these techniques. You might even be one of them. However, I still thought it might be a value to share with you what I’ve learned. I hope I don’t bore you with this stuff. Maybe there is a new strategy here that you can use for better results than what you are experiencing now.
5 Ways to Run Away from All Your Problems
If you want to ditch all your problems, then it does appear that you have a lot of company. As I said before, tons of people have gone before us paving the way. I found this to be great news and very reassuring because we can learn from their experience.
Here are five common strategies I found to run away from our problems:
1. Bury Your Head in the Sand
Probably one of the most common and promising strategies used to avoid problems is just to ignore them. We have an amazing ability to blind ourselves to the issues in our lives. If we don’t see and acknowledge the problems, then they simply don’t exist. It is almost a miracle at how effective this technique can be.
Of course, as with all strategies, this one does have a potential gotcha. Through some painstaking research and expert analysis, I have uncovered one pretty disturbing drawback of this approach that I think must have been hidden for years because so many have missed it.
It seems that those that utilize this approach later experience a day of reckoning. As I said, this is a pretty disturbing concept. What seems to happen is that all the ignored problems pile up and then one day, WHAM! They smack you right between the eyes with a crisis so huge that it is impossible to ignore despite even the best efforts of those very experienced with the strategy.
I found this discovery to be quite upsetting. At first, it seemed this was almost a perfect solution because it could be applied to practically any problem, but this day of reckoning thing really threw me for a loop so I decided to consider some other alternatives.
2. Get a Divorce
It is common knowledge and widely accepted that most problems originate with other people. We certainly aren’t the source of our own problems. That’s just ridiculous!
The closer a person is to you, the more leverage they have to create trouble for you. Therefore, it only stands to reason that your spouse is a big source of problems in your life. A divorce seems like a fast way to lighten up one’s life. After all, they aren’t called the old ball and chain for nothin’.
Again, this is a very popular strategy. Some researchers think that more than half of all marriages end in divorce so a lot of people have embraced divorce as something that works in avoiding problems. On the surface divorce looks like a fine way to quickly discard troublesome issues.
However, I’ve heard reports of divorce creating problems too. Apparently, it is not completely the panacea of good times its cracked up to be. There are rumors that It is loaded with financial issues and that it creates tons of complicated emotional problems especially when children are involved. Please don’t go spreading this information around. I don’t want my informants to know that I’m telling everyone their insider information.
It is really hard to believe that another very promising strategy for avoiding problems turns out to be saddled with cockleburs. Fortunately, there are still more
schemes tactics to consider.
3. Live on Credit
I’ve said before that “life takes money”, but unfortunately money problems are plentiful. In addition, they are stressful, difficult and persistent. The good news is that there are plenty of banks with piles of money more than willing to help. They are constantly offering tons of great deals on credit cards. Heck, they even want to pay you to get one of the their cards. How great of a deal is that?
Credit cards are taken just about everywhere nowadays. You can basically live on credit! This can really ease the burden in a financial pinch. Have you been laid off from work? No problem! Just whip out your trusty old credit card and presto, your money problems are solved. Whatever the situation, having a credit card in your pocket seems to ease the burden.
I was sure that no one could possibly spoil this strategy for avoiding problems. It seems so perfect, but then I ran across this article saying credit cards suck. Oh, please say it isn’t so! After I read about interest rate hikes, late fees and cancellations, I decided to do a little more research and found the truth about credit cards. It is truly a sad day!
It is depressing to find out that three really promising strategies for avoiding problems seem so full of pitfalls. I’m starting to wonder if there is any hope.
4. Lose All Hope
Speaking of hope, I’m beginning to think, “Why even try?” Life’s problems seem totally overwhelming and unavoidable at this point. I might as well just give up. Everyone is out to get me anyway. My boss, my spouse, even my kids have it in for me. There just doesn’t seem to be any solutions to these problems. Everywhere I turn I only see more trouble heading my way. It has always been this way for me. I guess I’m just cursed.
I’ve tried, I really have, but it just never works out. I can’t even avoid my problems. I don’t know why I think I can ever possibly get ahead and loose from them. I take one step forward and two steps back no matter how hard I try or what I do. Overall, I just don’t have the energy to deal with it anymore.
I’m going to go with the flow. I’m tired of fighting it. I’ll let the cards fall where they may. I’ll just run my life on autopilot. That promotion I was wanting is out of my reach anyway and even if I got it, I probably wouldn’t like the job. I’m sure it is just full of a lot of new problems I couldn’t avoid anyway. The finances are a little tight, but if it gets too bad I’ll just declare bankruptcy. What the heck!
I know I should want more for myself and my family, but it isn’t worth the hassle. They probably wouldn’t appreciate it anyway. Why go to all the trouble? I think if I just ignore it all, then it won’t bother me so much. This seems like the best approach. Of course, I’ll never get that life I always wanted, but I guess that’s just the hand I’ve been dealt. Oh well!
5. Sabotage Yourself
I began this project really expecting to find ways to avoid all my problems, but it has been a seriously depressing journey. I’m not sure how exactly I got here, but my life really sucks now. The pain caused by all the problems that I can’t seem to avoid is overwhelming.
On top of that, I had a really big problem pop up again just this week that I wish I could have avoided. I went to have a few drinks to enjoy life a little and to try to get my mind off my problems, but when I left the bar later than I intended, some idiot stopped short in front of me and I rear-ended him. Of course, the cop was a butt-head about the whole thing and wrote me a ticket for driving while intoxicated. I can’t believe he was so stupid about such a small deal.
Of course, the cop wasn’t the only one that blew this whole thing out of proportion. When I got home, my wife had a hissy-fit over it. She was so out-of-control telling me how irresponsible I’d been that I left and spent the night in a motel. I think she’s overreacting to an accident. She’s being totally unreasonable and might even use this to rationalize giving up on us. What a night full of crazy problems!
The next morning wasn’t much better. The alarm clock in the crummy motel didn’t go off and I overslept. My boss called me into his office when he saw me coming in an hour late. I tried to explain the situation and that it wasn’t my fault, but he lost his mind before I could finish. He said that this was the last straw. He fired me while going on and on ad nauseam about my poor attitude and performance. It was quite a show really seeing his total lack of self-control.
I’ve had some time to reflect on this and I’ve decided good riddance to all of them. I didn’t need them anyway. The problems they caused me were ruining my life. I’m going back to the bar to try to relax and forget about my troubles for awhile. It seems to be the only place where people understand me.
Running Away from Problems Isn’t Smart (or Effective)
I so wished that I would have thought of this article in time for April Fool’s Day. It really is foolish to think that we can run away from our problems. The only way to a better life is to fully and completely accept personal responsibility for all our outcomes. As an adult, we are responsible for the quality of our lives. We can’t blame anyone else for our troubles and we can’t simply run away from them.
“You have to take the position that you have always had the power to make it different, to get it right, to produce the desire result. For whatever reason – ignorance, lack of awareness, fear, needing to be right, the need to feel safe – you chose not to exercise that power. Who knows why? It doesn’t matter. The past is the past. All that matters now is that from this point forward you choose – that’s right, it’s a choice – you choose to act as if you are 100% responsible for everything that does or doesn’t happen to you.”
~ Jack Canfield, The Success Principles
I’ll admit that life can be hard. It can hand us a crummy mess from time-to-time, but the only way we can effectively fight back is to face life head on. We have to stop running from our problems and start doing something about them.
What are you going to do today to produce a better life?
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Found a pretty interesting article on a different blog that I normally read...
The Key to Getting What You Want
The Key to Getting What You Want
Do you know the real key to getting what you want?
The key to getting what you want is deciding exactly what it is that you want to acquire, accomplish or achieve.
It sounds simple, right? The trouble is that many, many people don’t know what it is that they want.
In addition, there is a lot of confusion out there about what it takes to get what you want. This is sad really because it means that a lot of people are struggling to live the life they desire simply because they don’t recognize this one simple key to success.
I want to emphasize that whatever it is that you fancy for yourself is available to you, if you clearly decide and define what it is first.
The Confusion About Getting What You Want
I know this all sounds very simplistic. When we hear it, most of us go, “Duh, why don’t you tell me something that I don’t know? This is just commonsense.”
Well, my response to that is twofold. First, if it is so self-evident, then why don’t more people know exactly how to make themselves happy? Furthermore, why are so many people doing the very things that lead to unhappiness and continue doing these things?
Second, why when I do a search on Google, do I find so many other answers? On the front page, I found articles professing each of the following as the key to getting what you want:
- Integrity – Yes, living according to your values is very important, but is it really the key to getting what you want? No. You can be living a principled life and pursing good things, but still be miserable because you aren’t really getting what you truly want.
- Persistence – Does it take persistence to get what you want? Absolutely! However, you can certainly be persistent in pursuing the wrong things too. So, persistence is not the most important key to getting what you want.
- Taking Action – You’ve certainly got to take action to make things happen. I’d definitely agree with that, but you can obviously act in the wrong direction. In fact, you can take action in the complete opposite direction from what you desire.
- Visualization – Visualizing what you want in your mind’s eye can be a very powerful technique to help focus on achieving your goals. However, if you don’t know exactly what you want first, how can you visualize it?
- Self-control – It definitely takes discipline to accomplish things. You’ve got to be able to get yourself up out of bed in the morning and keep yourself headed toward the objective. Of course, what’s the point if you don’t know what you are after?
I could go on and on because these are just what I found in the first few articles. I’m sure there are numerous other suggestions and I’m not belittling these authors or the point they are trying to make. I’m just saying that before you can do any of these other things to be successful, you’ve first got to clearly decide on what you want.
The Importance of Deciding What You Want
Why am I hammering on this point? Because it is crucial. There is something incredibly powerful about deciding what you want.
I will suggest to you that when you clearly and firmly decide that you want something, you almost always get it or something better.
Think about it for a moment. Recall something you really wanted 5 or 10 years ago. Chances are you have it now. I know this is true for me. I’ve been very conscious of this lately and it appears very reliable.
This is not magical. I don’t believe that. I’m simply saying that once you decide what you really want, then things just seem to happen so that you get it. It is that simple.
I’m not the only one saying this either. You can find some very successful people professing the very same thing. For example, take a look at these excerpts:
“In order to get what you want, you must first decide what you want. Most people really foul up at this crucial first step because they simply can’t see how it’s possible to get what they want — so they don’t even let themselves want it.”
~ Jack Canfield, #1 New York Times bestselling author
“There is no hope of success for the person who does not have a central purpose, or definite goal at which to aim. When you have Definiteness of Purpose fueled by a burning desire to reach your objectives, nothing can stand in your way.”
~ Napoleon Hill, author of the classic Think and Grow Rich
“All successful people, men and women, are big dreamers. They imagine what their future could be, ideal in every respect, and then they work every day toward their distant vision, that goal or purpose.”
~ Brian Tracy, speaker and author on personal development
These guys are some of the kings of success. They have all made careers teaching others how to be successful and they all three make it extremely clear that deciding firmly on exactly what you want is a very crucial step in the process.
The clearer you can be about what you want, the more likely you are to get it and the faster it will come.
How to Decide What You Want
If I asked you right now, what do you want more than anything else? Would you be able to answer me quickly, clearly and concisely? Most regular people cannot. They might, if they are particularly good, be able to stumble around and eventually name something, but most don’t know what they really want.
This isn’t something to be ashamed of, but it is something to fix. If you are most likely going to get what you want, then what are you going to get if you want nothing? I think you know.
Therefore, we all need to spend a little time figuring out exactly what we want. Here are a couple of suggestions that I really like from The Success Principles to help you get started:
1. Create an “I Want” List
I’d suggest beginning with this simple exercise to get your thoughts flowing in the right direction. We generally have some blocks when it comes to knowing what we want. So, it is important that you take a few minutes to warm up and stretch your mind to get it ready for action.
Get some paper and a pen, go to a quiet place and create three “I Want” lists. Clarify what you really want by making a list of 30 things that you want to do, 30 things you want to have and 30 things you want to be before you die. These three lists will help you to start formulating a picture of your desired future.
2. Write Down a Vision for Your Future
The second thing to do is to write out a narrative vision for your future. Remember when you were a kid and you had a picture in your head of what you’re life was going to be like when you grew up? You knew what your spouse was going to look like, how many kids you were going to have and what kind of car you were going to drive. Well, you need to create another such vision for your life.
Write down a detailed and descriptive vision of exactly where you want to get to in your life. You need to include these seven areas: work and career, finances, recreation and free time, health and fitness, relationships, personal goals, and contribution to the larger community. In each of these areas, allow yourself to imagine your ideal future and record that on paper.
Don’t let that negative inner voice tell you that your dreams are impossible. At this point, we are simply recording what we want. How we get there is a whole other issue. However, it is impossible to get to the success we desire if we don’t even know what it is. Also, think of it this way, what if you don’t get it all, but you get 80 or 90 percent of your ideal? Wouldn’t that be pretty sweet? Try to capture your ideal situation without any inhibition.
If you struggle with this exercise and need help getting it done, there is a wonderful guide in The Success Principles to assist you. Check the book out from your local library if you don’t want to buy it or if you want to preview it first. I think you’ll find it very helpful.
Deciding What You Want Is the Key to Getting It
Deciding exactly what success means to you and where you want to get to in your life is crucial to getting there. Otherwise, you are just floating along letting the currents take you wherever they are going. Why not decide for yourself? Get intentional about your life and you’ll be amazed at just how much of what you want will come your way. Of course, the beginning of all this is deciding exactly and firmly on precisely what you want. Have you done that yet?
Thursday, April 1, 2010
- Three weird tips to lose your stomach fat: I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that these tips are:
- Never eat anything but rice cakes and styrofoam.
- Inject battery acid into any place where you suspect you might have stomach fat.
- Relocate to the moon.
- One Trick to Eliminate Junk Food Cravings: This one’s really almost too easy. To eliminate junk food cravings, just keep eating junk food. All the time. Whenever you feel even a teensy urge to eat junk food, seek it out immediately. By never letting a mild interest in food escalate to actual hunger before you rush off to the nearest 7-11, you are guaranteed to never have junk food cravings.
- Five Surprising Fat-Burning Foods: Here are five foods that you would be surprised to find are fat-burning. I know I’d certainly be surprised.
- Giant Toblerone Bars
- Cheese Fondue
- Double-Stuf Oreos
PS: I have one additional weird tip you might want to try out, just in case these ones don’t work out: Ride your bike a lot, and stop eating before you’re full.
PPS: I know, that was two tips. That’s what made it so weird.